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Little Things...aka schmaltzy crap.
Mar. 7th, 2003 01:20 amToday was a good, if melancholy, day.
J and I had a long talk about growing older, having children, falling in love, and about all the other myriad meaningful things that make up a life. She said that at her age, looking back, it seems that she's lived several lives, the different stages being so distinct and disjointed. She said that she sometimes mourns the person that she was, but ultimately celebrates the person that she is. *shrugs* At the very least, it's an interesting way to categorize the world. Just as she finished her thoughts, one of our regulars came in with a big steaming cup of coffee and I was immediately transported to one of those "former lives."
Actually, I had been reminiscing about the past all day, but that olfactory cue paired with J's musings took me back to better times and former lives, as it were. I started thinking about all of those seemingly insignificant moments in a day that define what's important in our lives. And I'm not talking about the daily grind, doing the dishes, or suffering through the morning commute. I'm referring to those moments in the day where you pause, breathe, smile and think "this is what it's all about, this is what being alive means."
For me that cup of coffee was a reassuring reminder of all of those nights spent cramming for exams or staying up talking. Java in the PM is a sure sign that you've got all night to accomplish the impossible, be it professional or personal. It reminded me of midterms, elections, and all-nighters--the comfort of my college years. I also thought about the other moments of the sublime that I miss...waking up to the sound of voices murmuring in the other room, falling asleep as someone strokes your hair, having my little sisters fall asleep in my lap, the smell of the citrus groves on the way to the beach, and the post-party early morning gossip sessions on my big barge of a bed. These are all things that are part of the past...things I miss, people I miss. As silly as they seem, they're all snapshots of times where I felt at home in the world and convinced that things were just as they should be. I don't feel that way anymore, not often at least and it's a little sad.
God, I'd love to go on waxing poetically about the merits of the mundane, but I'm so tired that my eyes are crossing and my head is nodding. It's time to sleep. Goodnight all.
J and I had a long talk about growing older, having children, falling in love, and about all the other myriad meaningful things that make up a life. She said that at her age, looking back, it seems that she's lived several lives, the different stages being so distinct and disjointed. She said that she sometimes mourns the person that she was, but ultimately celebrates the person that she is. *shrugs* At the very least, it's an interesting way to categorize the world. Just as she finished her thoughts, one of our regulars came in with a big steaming cup of coffee and I was immediately transported to one of those "former lives."
Actually, I had been reminiscing about the past all day, but that olfactory cue paired with J's musings took me back to better times and former lives, as it were. I started thinking about all of those seemingly insignificant moments in a day that define what's important in our lives. And I'm not talking about the daily grind, doing the dishes, or suffering through the morning commute. I'm referring to those moments in the day where you pause, breathe, smile and think "this is what it's all about, this is what being alive means."
For me that cup of coffee was a reassuring reminder of all of those nights spent cramming for exams or staying up talking. Java in the PM is a sure sign that you've got all night to accomplish the impossible, be it professional or personal. It reminded me of midterms, elections, and all-nighters--the comfort of my college years. I also thought about the other moments of the sublime that I miss...waking up to the sound of voices murmuring in the other room, falling asleep as someone strokes your hair, having my little sisters fall asleep in my lap, the smell of the citrus groves on the way to the beach, and the post-party early morning gossip sessions on my big barge of a bed. These are all things that are part of the past...things I miss, people I miss. As silly as they seem, they're all snapshots of times where I felt at home in the world and convinced that things were just as they should be. I don't feel that way anymore, not often at least and it's a little sad.
God, I'd love to go on waxing poetically about the merits of the mundane, but I'm so tired that my eyes are crossing and my head is nodding. It's time to sleep. Goodnight all.
